🟣 Did I book an OnlyFans hotel?

My backpack straps were digging, my feet were aching, and a steamy bowl of noods was calling my name.

I was in Japan, squeezing every last drop out of the trip of a lifetime.

And at last here she was – my bed for the night.

Booked in a rush on Booking.com just that morning

7.4 stars (risky, I know) but it was looking like I’d got away with it.

I innocently got my key from reception and wandered over to my hut for the night, dreaming about the bowl of ramen I was going to face fuck that evening.

Key in door, backpack off shoulders, shoes off feet.

A quick whip round the gaff and it seemed I’d taken on the 7.4 rating and won. There were windows, the door locked and the bed was clean.

I was happier than a seagull at a bin convention.

To celebrate, I headed out onto the deck to feel the air in my toe cleavage.

Stunnin, there’s even a loveseat to admire the view.

But as I went to park my bum, I noticed the tripod.

Positioned square in front of the sofa. Just… waiting.

Hm.

Maybe the last guest had left it behind?

I peeked over at my neighbours deck…

Another tripod.

No big deal – maybe they forgot theirs too

But the next neighbour along after that had a third tripod

The maths was maths-ing at this point.

I’d only gone and booked an OnlyFans house.

I was going to have to be careful what I ordered at dinner – ‘steamy bowl of noods’ might get me more than I bargained for

But really I only had myself to blame for my night in a sex hotel

I’d left finding this place to the last minute. I’d not read the reviews. I’d not ‘deeped’ my research in any way.

Obviously if I’d seen ‘rent by the hour’, ‘tripod included’ or ‘wipe-clean’ I might’ve looked elsewhere (maybe).

But in that moment I clicked confirm, I just wanted it off the to do list.

I wanted to spend more time doing the thing than preparing to do the thing

And I guarantee you’ve felt the same about your fitness journey.

Before you even set foot in the gym you might feel you’ve got a shit-ton of stuff to understand…

What program is right for me?

How do I make sure I’m going to see progress?

What’s the best form for these movements?

And then to get to your answers, you’ve got to wade through buckets of fitness fuckery online

When actually, all you really want to do is ‘the thing’.

That’s why I created Bits.

Whether you’re looking to get stronger or are completely new to the gym, the Bits app has you covered.

Video tutorials, bags of progressive programmes and progress tracking, all in one place.

Plus we’ve even got a nifty lil wizard that’ll point you towards a program that suits your goals in less than a minute

Bits is a one-stop shop to shortcut all that fucking about you might feel you have to do before you roll up to the gym.

Just turn up, plug in and get it done.

Huh - might suggest that as the new slogan for the Japanese sex hotel.

Big love

Rachel